Why do people eat salt and vinegar chips?

I’m not a macho man. I cry watching sad movies and listening to good music. But I know this: if you can’t handle the searing beauty of salt and vinegar chips, you’re weak and don’t deserve to eat any variety of deep-fried potato.

Someone on Reddit also knows this, and last week went to the trouble of testing 11 types of Aussie salt and vinegar chips – a project that feels more 2020 lockdown than 2022 freedom. The aim? Crowning the strongest chip. That’s right, the strongest, not the “most intense” or the “saltiest”.

Behold the very scientific method:

We were looking for which chip had the strongest flavour initially and the strongest aftertaste.

French Fries being so little were judged on a handful instead of a singular chip.

All these chips were bought on the same day and were eaten by myself and two others.

A chart was made, Low, Medium and High, of which we ranked which chip belonged where, changing what needed to be changed after all chips were eaten.

We then analysed our results seeing which ones had the most highs and worked our way to the one that had the most lows.

To which some wag replied: “No pH testing or salt filtration? I was going to nominate you for an Ig Nobel prize but your methods seem subjective at best. Let’s file this one under ‘further research required’.”

The results were thus:

1. Aldi Sprinters
2. Red Rock Deli
3. Smith's
4. Blackstone
5. Kettle
6. Natural Chip Co
7. French Fries
8. Thins
9. Tyrrell’s
10. Pringles
11. Vege Chips

S&V fiends will notice the conspicuous absence of Samboy, which would surely sweep the field. To that our tester says: “I really wanted to include Samboys as they seemed awesome, but as they seem to be very difficult to get where I live they could not be included. Put them at the top of the list in your heart if you wish.”

“Samboys is the king in exile of this list,” another commenter says.

As is always the case on Reddit, the post comments are where the real juice is – and where I learnt, today, that the skin in some people’s mouths actually peels after eating S&V. I had no idea this was a thing and apologise profusely to any mouth-peelers I may have called weak just now.

Here are a few more choice comments:

“My tongue is splitting just thinking about this.”

“It made me gleek. Proposing this as the word of the day.”

“Did you have palate cleansers in between?”

“Fucking Pringles [and its blue packaging]. Everyone knows salt and vinegar taste like pink.”

“When I lost my taste during Covid, S&V chips were a godsend. I could hear the distant whine of vinegar through the static.”

“I worked for Smith’s which make the Aldi brand too and I can confirm Aldi version have a higher flavour specification on all their chips.”

“I ate a bag of Aldi chips myself on a long drive years ago. The skin on the tongue and inside of my cheeks was sloughing off the next day. Freaked me out!”

“[A] few years ago I nailed two packets of Smiths and later that night I was peeling huge pieces of skin off the roof of my mouth and insides of my cheeks. It was amazing how much skin I pulled out of there. I can’t vouch for any of these flavours being the best but for an internal skin remover I highly recommend Smiths.”

One salt and vinegar chip fanatic has found the brand that has the most intense version of the potato snack flavour, but not everyone agrees.

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An Australian redditor believes they have cracked the code when it comes to which brand of salt and vinegar chips has the strongest taste, but it hasn’t come without strong debate.

In a post to subreddit r/australia, salt and vinegar fans have found themselves salivating at the sight of 11 chip brands ranked most to least strongest in taste.

Topping off the list is Aldi’s Sprinters, followed by Red Rock Deli, Smiths, Blackstone and Kettle.

Natural Chip Co sits safely in the middle at sixth place while French Fries, Thins, Tyrell’s, Pringles and Vege chips respectively rank 7th to 11th.

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The self-proclaimed “proud Australian” redditor drew the conclusion after determining which chip had the strongest flavour and aftertaste.

“All these chips were brought on the same day by myself and were eaten by myself and two others,” the redditor outlined in a comment explaining their method.

Using a three-category chart with the labels low, medium and high, the trio ranked each chip based on their assessments.

French Fries were the exception, being judged by the handful opposed to a single fry due to their small size.

“We then analysed our results seeing which ones had the most highs and worked our way to the one that had the most lows,” they said.

While a humorous debate instantly kicked off over the non-scientific method used to draw the conclusion, others quickly added their thoughts on whether they believed the ranking was correct.

One redditor justified how they would rank each brand by specifically focusing on their ingredients.

“Kettle is the most intense by far and therefore superior in my view. Also they use Apple cider vinegar (based),” they said, followed by Smiths in second place.

“Blackstone‘s are fantastic but they use onion powder which means I can’t indulge. French Fries are great and the Vege Chips are good as well. Pringle’s are good for something different but hard to find.”

Meanwhile, another redditor argued Kettle should rank in third place opposed to Smiths.

“Smiths is wayyyy more chill. I go for Kettle when my mouth can handle Kettle’s intensity. Smiths when I want the rich flavour but not the skin stripping,” they commented.

Others were particularly vocal about Sam Boys not even making an appearance on the list, with many arguing that the brand would have easily taken out the top spot.

“Missus opens a bag of those (and) I can smell the b***ards two rooms away!” one comment read.

To the experimenter’s defence, they wanted to include the brand in their research but were unable to find it in their vicinity.

The unofficial experiment also led to debate about one brand not sticking to the status quo, with eagle-eyed viewers pointing out that Pringles have failed to comply with the colour code.

All other brands have some form of pink or purple design on their package to indicate that its salt and vinegar flavoured, while Pringles’ design in blue.

“Funny how Magenta became the colour of salt and vinegar,” one user pointed out. “Except Pringles which said f*** you, (let’s go) blue.”

Another user commented: “As long as I remember, S & V has always been in magenta packets.”

“Blue = Plain (salted), Magenta = Salt and Vinegar, Green = Chicken, Sun Gold = BBQ (and) Yellow = Cheese and Onion.”

In response, a third user said, “this is God’s law”.

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While redditors have a semi-official list detailing the intensity of salt and vinegar chip brands, we may never know for sure which chip will officially take out the top spot due to our varying tastebuds.

And all debate aside, Vege Chips do not deserve to ranked on the bottom.

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