November 24, 2021 Posted by AMIT SUTHAR A question that comes up more frequently than you’d think is whether it is “okay” to have more than one best man in your wedding. Most guys are too embarrassed to come right out and say they are having trouble picking between their buddies, assuming that having multiple best friends is kind of girly in a “like OMG you’re one of my BFFs” sort of way. So, before you down your which-guy-to-pick stress with the help of a
flask, we’ll set the record straight. While it is “traditional” to have one best man, there is no reason why you can’t have multiple best men in this day and age. Heck, some guys even have women as “best men.” Just remember, that if you really do have more than one best man, you’ll need to give them all the duties and honors that go along with it (including presenting nice
groomsmen gifts), otherwise, they’re really just still be groomsmen. There are reasons why you might want to have more than one main wingman buttoning up his best man cufflinks in your wedding. For example, imagine that you became friends with a group of two or three guys at the same time (such as grade school, college or wherever) and each
has provided the same level of friendship to you over the years. It would be too awkward to delegate one to become a mere groomsmen; pick them all. Or, imagine that you are super tight with your best friend, but you also have a brother. He could be a pesky little brother or a controlling older brother. While you may not have the same friendship with your brother, family ties last forever. So it’s a good idea to put him in the spotlight alongside your friend. This leads to another question.
If you have multiple best men (and this even pertains to the groomsmen), how do you line them up? You could choose the coveted spot right at your side by a coin toss, or in terms of “seniority.” This means, the first person standing next to you should be the person you’ve known the longest; this is undoubtedly going to be a brother, if you have one. If you have more than one older brother, you’ve known them both the same amount of time – since birth! Give the oldest of the older sibling
seniority. Next, younger brothers and then friends in the order of how long you’ve known them can be lined up. Another twist is when the bride wants her own brother to be one of your groomsmen. If you’re not buddy-buddy, stick him at the end, but make him feel important by carrying your note cards or something. Don’t forget to give each an important role and responsibility in the wedding and thank them with a token of your appreciation, such as with
personalized best man gifts suited to the personality of each.
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How many groomsmen can you have in a wedding?
How many groomsmen is too many? How many groomsmen are there usually?
Ah, questions, questions.
Usually people ask this question about how many bridesmaids to have standing up in your wedding but lately, we’ve been getting this question from our couples: how many groomsmen can I have? That, coupled with: how many best men can I have?
Here’s the answer.
How Many Groomsmen You Can Have
The number of groomsmen you can have in your wedding is… any amount that you want! Ha, I know you were probably expecting a specific answer.
But really, as a general rule of thumb, the best number of groomsmen tends to coincide with the number of bridesmaids on the opposite side. If you have one best man and one maid of honor, that’s nice and balanced at the altar.
If you choose two bridesmaids, two groomsmen works perfectly.
You get the idea.
How Many Groomsmen and Bridesmaids
Do you have to choose the same number of groomsmen and bridesmaids? No, but it seems to work best in photos when you do. :)
This doesn’t mean to choose just anyone to be a groomsman simply to make the numbers match; that would be crazy. If you choose three bridesmaids and two groomsmen, nothing bad will happen, you’ll just need to get a little creative with your wedding photos to make them look more balanced. Your wedding photographer should have some great suggestions to do so, and it’s no big deal.
If you’re planning to have the wedding party dance at the first dance with you as a couple, then obviously, you’ll need everyone to be paired up. But then again, no biggie either way.
Ideally, it seems the perfect number of groomsmen to have in a wedding is anywhere from 2 to 4; larger weddings typically select 5 to 6 groomsmen to be in the wedding.
Large Wedding Parties = More Money Spent
We love a big wedding party.
But keep in mind that the more groomsmen you choose for your wedding equals more expenses.
There will be more tuxedo rentals or suit purchases, along with additional invited guests, as each groomsmen gets to invite a “plus-one” to the wedding, according to traditional etiquette.
This also equates to more groomsmen gifts to purchase.
There are two additional expenses some couples don’t factor in:
• the additional place setting / setup at the head table, and
• the cost of transportation for a larger wedding party, if you’re planning to get a limousine or a party bus
If you can afford it, the more the merrier!
If not, we recommend downsizing your bridal party. There’s nothing wrong with having one best man and one maid of honor if you’re not in favor of a large wedding party.
And I recommend, if you do like a bridal party, to keep it to four groomsmen and four bridesmaids. It seemed to work perfectly for us.
How Many Best Men Can I Have?
If you can’t decide on one best man, sure — go ahead and ask two best men to be in your wedding. Brides do it all the time with the Maid of Honor and sometimes, you just need to give two people the honor. However, we recommend keeping it to just two: any more than that and it is recommended to nix the Best Man title altogether and give them the titles of groomsmen.
Do You Have to Ask Groomsmen With Proposal Gifts?
No! Groomsmen proposal gifts are fun, but they aren’t a requirement. We do like when they’re kept simple: ask over the phone, in person, or give a small gift like this one from DanielleTaylorCo. It always gets a laugh!
Want to go a bit bigger? This groomsmen gift box is always in style! By ThePersonalizedGift.
Now that you know how many groomsmen to have in your wedding, or at least some suggestions on it, what is the number of groomsmen YOU’LL have in yours? Tell us about it in the comment box below. We’d love to hear about it!
Hope it helps!
xo
Emma